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To Blush or not to Blush

30/6/2016

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PictureIs blushing a real problem that's stopping you from living your life?
Picture the scene, you’re in a busy work’s canteen packed to the rafters with people enjoying their lunch and as you stand up to place your tray complete with plate, cutlery, half drunk cup of tea back in the trolley, you trip, fall in a heap on the floor with said crockery scattered around you, fully aware that the whole room has stopped talking and is now staring at you. Of course they are only looking at you for a second and the kind people rushing to help you only add to your embarrassment causing you to blush which in the circumstances is completely natural.

However blushing or the fear of blushing can for some people be a real problem and can be triggered by everyday situations like being asked the time by a stranger or talking to the opposite sex. This in turn can cause anxiety and can make anxious situations like going for an interview, finding a partner or having a social life even more stressful. Although clever make-up can conceal the problem it does very little to get to the bottom of what is causing you to blush in the first place, what is the underlying cause?

Blushing is linked to our Fight or Flight instinct which is fired up when dealing with anything that causes deep emotion such as fear or anger. Our body releases adrenalin and stress hormones which prepares it to either run away or to deal with the threat which in turn causes our heart to race as extra blood is pumped into it, our pupils dilate, and muscles tend to tense up. This is fine if we are really in danger but if the trigger is embarrassment then the sweaty palms, red face and heart pumping only add to the situation and only when the feeling subsides, does your body return to normal. Blushing is the body’s way of cooling down a body that has been fired up to deal with a situation that isn’t a threat.

Picture
​Blushing normally occurs in a social situation, you don’t normally blush if you drop a drink or trip up if you are on your own. This is probably because we are aware of what others think of us and worry about how we are perceived. For instance, a young child wouldn’t blush as they are unaware of how they should act in public and what is or isn’t deemed ‘acceptable behaviour’. As we grow older we are more aware of how others think of us and how we deal with new situations, and teenagers who are dealing with changes within their body and the stresses that school and social situations cause, can be prone to feeling anxious and self-conscious. However, I also see many adults who are limited by this problem in their work situation despite their awesome abilities at doing their job successfully. Meetings and public speaking can exacerbate the problem with many people, preventing them to take on new jobs and enjoy their work.

Some people suffer from ‘Chronic Blushing’ or ‘Erythrophonia’, which is a fear or phobia of blushing that actually causes them to blush which is triggered by any situation where other people are involved. This is a vicious circle where blushing causes the person to use all their energy wondering if others have noticed them blushing and if so “what can they possibly think of me?”, and “they must wonder why I’m blushing?”, and “they must have noticed by now” and so on, which causes them to blush even more. Hence they tend to over think every situation, whereas the reality is often much less complicated, and others are more caught up in their own thoughts and actions, rather than worrying about what anyone else is doing.

It is important for the person to take control and think more positively about themselves by taking a moment to stand up tall, release any tension in the shoulders which is making them appear smaller in themselves, in order to give a positive feedback message to their brain that they are more confident and to stop releasing the stress hormones cortisol and adrenaline.. Pretend you are a ‘Super Hero’ and try changing your posture to stand up tall in a more confident stance and give yourself a pep talk.
  • You are a strong self assured confident person
  • You can cope with this situation
  • You will be positive
  • You will manage this situation
  • You will think rationally
  • In the grand scheme of things this is a very unimportant moment.
And if you do blush
  • This is situation is fine and managable
  • I can deal with this
  • I am going to tackle this head on and deal with it in a calm confident manner
​Different ways of relaxation also help such as breathing exercises, mindfulness, hypnotherapy interventions and exercise, can all help in relaxing and calming you down.
Hypnotherapy is a powerful tool I use along with NLP (Neurolinguistic Programming) and (Time Line Therapy) to release any hidden ‘demons’ that have been buried deep in the unconscious mind that cause this self-consciousness and anxiety, and replace them with new positive ones allowing you to move on with your life in a more positive, confident and relaxed way.
For help in getting to the root cause of what is actually causing you to blush please get in touch as I can help to release any negative beliefs that are holding you back from being the confident person you want to be and deserve to be. You are capable and you can deal with situations so much better, which will allow you to enjoy life in a much calmer and contented way.



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Hypnotherapy – Is it just all in the mind?

9/6/2016

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​What springs to mind when you think of Hypnotherapy? Someone telling you ‘To Look into My Eyes?’ while waving a watch in front of you? Perhaps you know someone who has been hypnotised to pretend to be a chicken or worse, all in the name of ‘entertainment’? 

Hypnosis still isn’t taken seriously enough which is a shame, because if used properly by a professional it has so many benefits and is used to help a number of different illnesses/phobias, or to stop bad habits as well as treating stress related illnesses.

So what is Hypnosis?
"In therapy, hypnosis usually involves the person experiencing a sense of deep relaxation with their attention narrowed down, and focused on appropriate suggestions made by the therapist." You are not in a deep sleep but aware of what you are being told by the therapist and while in this state your conscious mind is ‘switched off’ allowing your unconscious mind to be ‘woken up ’and ideas and new beliefs to be suggested ‘cementing’ in all that’s positive for each individual.(1)

PictureHypnotherapy helps new ideas & beliefs to be suggested to the individual.
Hypnotherapy is a powerful tool I use along with NLP (Neurolinguistic Programming) and (Time Line Therapy) to  release any hidden ‘demons’ that have been buried deep in the unconscious mind, and replace them with new positive ones allowing you to move on with your life in a more positive relaxed way.
I talk all my clients through everything I am about to do and only do what is right for each person to achieve the results that they want. Being a Master Hypnotherapist provides me with an array of techniques that really help me to open whatever is being held in the unconscious mind that allows my clients to release whatever is holding them back and allow them to move forward positively more easily and effectively.

I use hypnotherapy throughout the process and to complete the sessions to lock in all the learning’s and goals to allow you to make the change easily. I also encourage my clients to record our hypnotherapy sessions so that they can listen to them at home to reinforce all that is relevant to them, aligning and refocusing the mind even after the sessions have finished. Invaluable!!!

PictureHypnotherapy can help you feel more in control.

Hypnotherapy can help the following:
  • Stress/Anxiety/Depression
  • IBS
  • Low self esteem/confidence
  • Sleep
  • Smoking
  • Weight management
  • Confidence & self esteem
  • Phobias (Fear of Flying, Spiders, Snakes etc)
  • Bad Habits (Smoking, Nail Biting)
  • And so much more
Hypnotherapy helps you regain control over your thoughts and emotions which has a direct impact on your behaviour helping you feel more confident and in control. If you feel that you are not the person you used to be or want to be, or feel like you’ve lost your identity or need help solving a specific issue please get in touch. I only take on client’s who are 100% committed to making that change so ring me so we can have good chat to make sure it is right for both of us before committing.

Fix The Cause, Not Just The Symptoms!

For more information please see http://www.mind-bodywellness.co.uk/

References below linked to the numbers stated above, plus some other reading used to produce this blog:
  1. http://www.hypnosis.me.uk/pages/whatis.html                                                

http://www.mind-bodywellness.co.uk/hypnotherapy.html

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    Author

    Nicky Anstey, Master Hypnotherapist, NLP Life Coach and Registered Nutritionist in Surrey. Who's aim is to be healthy and happy as much as possible!

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